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How You are Involved in Partisan Parenthood
Most parents who are involved in partisan parenthood would most likely put up a defense if they were confronted with the realities of the consequences. Of course no one intend to cause any ill, its just that the law of cause and effect has the spirit of its own. Partisan parenthood is at the root of various maladjustment among siblings.
Can you believe Richard Branson, Michael Phelps, Tommy Hilfiger, Anderson Cooper, Charles Schwab, Whoopi Goldberg, that all these people were diagnosed with learning disorder as growing ups? But their parents rather than comparing them with other kids realized the advantage of disadvantages and provided the enabling environment that brought out the treasure in them.
Preferring a child to another and making it obvious is partisan parenthood. A psychological syndrome might cause fathers to be more attracted to the girl child and mothers to the boy child. But parents must find a way to maintain a balance.
In terms of performance, children are bound to vary from one another, and naturally we are more likely to prefer the more brilliant, the stronger, or the livelier to their contrasting match. However, we must realize there is a treasure in every child waiting to be harnessed. Better parenting is to know your children well and how they want to be treated individually. Comparing them, to their faces breeds envy, mischief, low self esteem, unhealthy rivalry, and degenerates further to hatred among siblings.
Imagine for instance, a parent who has been scolding a child for getting overall "C" in academic performance, then the child strives and comes home with overall "B." Should the parent commend that child and reinforce the performance? Yes. But the child gets the usual scolding. Quite unfortunate, but that’s what partisan parenting turns you to, you don’t realize when you become a chronic critic and you fail to recognize when a less lovable child starts to get better. Guess what could become of that child! S/he relapses back to "C" and worse, because in the whole of his/her world there is no reason to do better.
Parents should focus on developing the unique potentials of their children. love and care should be evenly dispensed. Paying attention to peculiarities should not be according to the parent’s preference but according to the uniqueness of each child. Love is best practiced not in the way a lover wants but in the way the loved prefers. Each child seems to have a love theme which combines a range of preferences, the reception of which makes them feel loved and important. Don’t be a partisan parent!
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